K is for Habits...

I have no habits nor superstitions except sleeping on my right side, scrunching my nose during allergy season, sticking my pointer finger in Lexi's nose, scratching my head with my pinkies, etc, etc, etc...

I, especially, do not have a habit of tipping the homeless with some cha-ching.

Recently, however, I might have a change of heart, thought, and undies. I might...

I have been camping in a tent, no, two different tents, more than seven days, or a dragged out date with the mosquitoes.

When you camp, it's hard to keep yourself clean. The hardest part of camping is not the mosquitoes, the smoke, the overeating, nor the sleeping with the chain saw in the background, TIMMM-ber; I almost hit you that time. The hardest part is simply the feeling that you are not clean. Camping motto should be: Dirty mouth, snap into a slim jim.

It takes skills, yes, talent to stay and remain dirty. It's hard work. It sucks. I rather not, mostly.

Getting back to the homeless... man I saw recently. Most of the time, like always, I like to stare at the homeless, with my left eye, to see if they are really homeless or if they just hold signs to get free cha-cha-ching. (That's two coins.) I make my subjective biased judgment of how homeless a person is by how dirty the person is. (It's also interesting that you find more men homeless people holding signs than women. The women just hate dirty mouth so much they would rather find a job, a house, a garden, a husband, a life, in that particular order. That's why I don't get how Jessica Simpson hates brushing her dentals.)

It takes work and dedication to stay dirty and remain happy. Therefore, instead of paying these homeless people because of pure sympathy, you should pay them because it's just plain dirty work to stay dirty. So if you been camping, you can look at the homeless people and say: I understand, I empathize; and not give them any cha-ching, just some ching.

I gave the homeless man with his nice yellow bicycle (I own zero nice yellow bicycle) a empty smile and pure empathetic brain wave with my left eye.

Dirty mouth, stay dirty and thirsty my friends.