... Ingredients for a wonderful weekend:
Snowboarding and shopping
Appetizers with a favorite girlfriend
Sleeping in late and cuddling with your husband
Picnic at the park and feeding the ducks with family
Dinner with two best friends and their spouses
Inspirational messages delivered by an apostle
Birthday party
Lazy Sunday afternoon
Dearest food,
I'm sorry, it's not you, it's me. I think we need a break. It's been good, I mean great 25, 26 years but we really need a break, maybe forever. I'm sorry... well sort of. Goodbye my once lover...
I loved food since I was very little, (ed being the key tense here) like since I was 7lbs and minutes old; so it's been a long time. I loved food before I got married. (ed being the key tense again) You might be thinking to yourself, "Hmmm, maybe he is talking about his weight gain." [OCD Sharing Time: All recently married couple gain weight. All Asian people eat rice. All Asian people eat only half serving per day, unless your name is Kobayashi, "the all you can eat hot dog" or a sumo wrestler.] However, you would be sadly mistaken, kind of. Yes, I did gain some weight but I don't think it has anything to do with the amount of food digested, but probably the lack of exercise. I'm putting my money on the dusty gym pass. Anywho, I have parted ways with food all together because I hate doing the dishes. Let me share an equation: food + my belly = me happy. Simple right? [OCD Sharing Time: All Asians are great at math. That's why I was an English major. Suck eggs stereotypes!] Here's another equation: wife + cooking + dishes + dishes + four different spatulas + ten pans + food = my belly ache + phalanges ache + body ache. Yes, it's an exaggeration but not by much. Wait, I forgot two sets, not two measuring cups, two sets of measuring cups. Oh wait, I forgot three tasting spoons, and the dirty wall for checking pasta consistency. I feel like it's Hell's Kitchen every night, except my Gordon Ramsey or whatever his name is, is much better looking, however maybe I would rather have him and his ever-so-emotional cooks, because they would have less dishes, or maybe they would have a designated dish washer, much like designated hitters in baseball, sometimes I feel like a designated dish breaker. [OCD Sharing Time: All Asians love baseball, because they are too feeble to play football. All Asians love Chinese food and love doing dishes.]
Lexi: What do you want for dinner? (thinking: How many spatulas can I use tonight? hmm...)
Me: Oh I ate a late lunch, like ten minutes ago. (It's 5pm.)
Lexi: Why did you do that? (thinking: Idiot!)
Me: Oh, I love food so much and I was hungry, so hungry. (thinking: I hate dishes. Total Cooking Time = 1- 1.5 hr; Total Washing Time [Dishwasher Included] = 30-45 mins... 7 times a week. Again thinking: I hate dishes. I'm sorry dinner, you have to go.)
But, I'm too weak. I only break up to make up. Maybe I got it all wrong. I just need to figure out how I can eat delish food without the all the dishes, 1 hour worth. [OCD Sharing Time: All girls like to cook. All boys have to eat and then do the dishes; I just prefer not to. I just remembered why I ate out so much.]
Here is a picture I need to share...
PS... If you merely say or hint that you want a puppy/baby, you are liar and not ready to be a parent... unless you are ready to steal a baby or maybe part ways with one or more of your body parts, like phalanges or limbs. Until you are ready to make those kind of sacrifices, you should keep your comments to yourself-ves. (I used YOU as an universal YOU, not thinking of anyone in particular.)
... This year, as with every year before, I swore off American Idol before the season started.
"Why won't they just let the show die?" I asked. It's obvious America is no longer interested in another made-for-tv mediocre singer. Eight seasons is seven seasons too many, I said.
When I heard they were bringing on another a judge, I was slightly tempted. And then I reminded myself that I was so over American Idol.
The singers are never that great, I said, and the wrong person always gets kicked off too soon (think Chris Daughtry, Jennifer Hudson, Michael Johns). What's the point of watching? Besides, American Idol is totally second-rate compared to So You Think You Can Dance.
But sometimes, a show is a phenomenon because it really is that good.
And I am loving American Idol this season.
... Alma and I got a special calling last Sunday.
As it was explained to us by the bishopric member, our married student ward has a high turnover. And there are a lot of members, but not so many callings. So there are some callings in our ward one doesn't normally find in a family ward.
Like ours: Ward Choir Members. Just think of us like this:
And yes, we were even sustained and set apart for it.
We'll now be attending church for four hours every Sunday. Yay.
... Do you want to see your favorite newlywed couple on the cover of this magazine?
(The pic's a bit fuzzy, it the Utah Bride and Groom Magazine.)
If so, here's what you need to do:
1. Go to the magazine's photo contest website.
2. Find this picture (#1072) of me and Alma:
3. Scroll to the bottom of the page, and enter your name, email address, and our picture's number (1072). Click enter.
4. (Optional) Repeat with as many different email addresses as you have.
If we get the most votes, not only will we be on the cover of the magazine (yay!) but we'll also get a free canvas print from our photographer, Brody Dezember (double yay!).
Thanks for your help everyone!
... Alma and I went snowboarding on Saturday. It's one of the few activities we both enjoy doing. At least, that's what Alma thought.
I may have been a bit dishonest about my actual feelings toward snowboarding while we were dating. I may have gone snowboarding a few times last year with Alma and never complained once. I may have said that I really enjoy snowboarding. I may have actually gone so far as to buy snowboarding equipment.
Taking all that into consideration, it may have come as a bit of a shock to Alma on Saturday when, mid-way through our first run down the mountain, after falling for like the kajillionth time, I starting crying and yelling about how much I hate snowboarding and that I never want to go again.
Eventually I did make it down the mountain, and surprisingly, I even went down a few more times. But needless to say, that's probably the last time Alma and I will go snowboarding together.
Anyone in the market for some almost brand-new snowboarding equipment?
... March has definitely come in like a lion.
After a week of relatively warm (60 degrees) and sunny days at the end of February, March has brought with it wind, rain, clouds, and snow. Miserable.
(There is a teeny, tiny, unselfish part of me that is slightly happy for the snow, because it means that Alma will have fresh powder on the mountain when he goes snowboarding. But that part of me is getting drowned out by the loud, selfish, complaining part.)
Here's hoping that March will go out like a lamb, but you never can know with this crazy Utah weather!
... Wednesday is our favorite day of the week. Some reasons why Wednesday is so great:
At the end of the day, you're closer to Friday than Monday.
Lost is on.
We get to see Jared, Jeannie, and Jace.
Alma plays basketball.
I get to spend some girl-time with my sister.
... We always go to my sister's house to watch Lost, but this week they're out of town.
We're a little lost (haha, no pun intended) without our Wednesday routine. We miss you guys. Come home soon.
... I don't know if all ya'll watch ABC's show The Bachelor, but last night's show was craaaazy.
I was at the gym last night, and because there was nothing better on the TV's, I watched the last two episodes of The Bachelor. Or maybe I should say the last episode, and then the follow-up to the last episode episode. I haven't seen any of this season, but last night's episodes sucked me right in. Too bad it's over with now. Or is it? Apparently, you never know with The Bachelor.
As I'm sure everyone knows, the last episode is the one where the bachelor picks one of two girls to propose to. So he dumped one, and proposed to the other, and they were so happy and cute together. I got a little emotional myself thinking of how happy Alma and I were when we got engaged. It was heartwarming. Exactly the kind of emotional response ABC wants you to have to the show.
AND THEN, not thirty seconds after the end of that episode, when you still have warm-fuzzy feelings, the "After the Final Rose" episode comes on. And guess what?
The bachelor has changed his mind. He made a mistake. He's actually in love with the other girl - you know, the one he dumped. He then proceeds to dump his current fiancee, and then ask the other girl for a second chance. By the end of the show, he's repeating all the things he said to the first girl when he proposed to her, except this time it's to the one he dumped in the last episode. How ridiculous is that? It was like a slap in the face to all of us who we're feeling so happy during the previous episode.
Reality shows are crazy, ya'll. They should be called: "A Distorted Reflection of Reality" shows. They sure make for some entertaining shows, though.
